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Transcripts · Rooster Tooths

Episode 19: Whole Lot of Shaking

Fade in to the Reds around Andy
Andy:
Thirty! Twenty-nine! Twenty-eight!
Donut:
Waaaaa! We're all gonna die!
Grif:
More importantly, I'm going to die! That's the worst part!
Sarge:
Men, remain calm. This is no time to panic.
Andy:
Twenty-five! ...Twenty-four. Twenty-three!
Simmons:
Sir, the world is shaking apart, the ground is opening up to swallow us, and we're holding a bomb that will wipe us all out before any of that happens.
As if to help make the point, a giant rock falls down behind him
Simmons:
I submit to you that if there is a time to panic, this is that time.
Andy:
Twenty. Nineteen! Eighteen!
Sarge:
You're right Simmons.
Grif:
I guess this is it everyone.
Simmons:
Does anyone have anything they wanna say?
Donut:
I do! Well, gosh, this is such an honour. H-I have so many people to thank. All the little people.
Simmons:
Donut, this is not the time for your pre-rehearsed Academy Award speech!
Donut:
Well if I don't use it now, when am I going to?
Andy:
Ten! Nine!
Tremor
Andy:
Eight!
Sarge:
Men it's been an honour to serve with you. And I say that using the loosest possible definition of the words 'honour' and 'serve'.
Andy:
Six! Five!
Grif:
My only regret, is that I don't have more regrets!
Andy:
Four, three!
Simmons:
Well, if I'm gonna die then I may as well be honest.
Tremor starts
Simmons:
I never respected any of you, I thought I was better than all of you this entire time, I think my skills were underappreciated-
Tremor ends
Simmons:
-and I wasted my life knowing all of you. In a way, I'm sad to die, but I'm glad knowing that none of you will live either. There, I said it.
Andy:
One! Kaboom! ...n-ah, wait, uh- KA- Geuagh, eugh, dammit!
Tremor
Andy:
Heungh... Kem... Daboom-ah, heuh.
Donut:
The bomb was a dud?
Andy:
I s- I s- I swear this never happens to me.
Sarge:
So, did you wanna finish your thought there, Simmons?
Everyone looks at him
Simmons:
Well, this is awkward.
Andy:
Yeah, tell me about it.
Cut to the Blues
Tucker:
Okay we're all set!
Caboose:
Okay I'm driving.
Tucker:
What? Fuck no!
Tex:
Come on Church, get in!
Church:
I'm not coming.
Tucker:
You're not?
Church:
Nah, you guys go. Good luck. I don't know how much time we have left and I, think I'd rather spend it some place I like.
Tremor
Church:
Oh if you see Agent Washington, do me a favour, tell him I said memory is the key. He'll know what that means. Oh and also, tell him I said thanks. Good luck guys.
Tex:
Well I'm goin'. You can sit around here until the world ends; but as long as I'm here, there's something I can do about it.
Church:
Tex I wouldn't expect anything else.
Tremor starts
Caboose:
Church, I-
Tucker:
Aw crap!
Tex:
This tank needs to move, right now.
Cut to the Reds
Sarge:
Everyone, get in the digger!
Simmons:
It's no use Sarge, there's no time!
Donut:
Repent, repent! Give up your evil ways! The end is nigh!
Tremor ends
Simmons:
Oh shut up Donut!
Grif:
Yeah. Did you suddenly find God or something?
Donut:
Yeah, I've never been much for religion, but I figure I can get in just under the wire. Why not hedge my bet?
Tremor
Grif:
Calm down, the world is not ending. Everything will be just fine. Everyone always thinks the world's gonna end during their lifetimes, but the truth is, none of us are that cool or interesting. So get over it.
Tremor
Simmons:
At the current rate of decay, the world will shake itself apart in just a few minutes!
Andy:
Hey, does this team's health insurance plan cover the apocalypse?
Grif:
Give it a rest Andy.
Cut to Freelancer Citybase, with North looking at the rankings and York walking past him
North:
List changed again.
York:
Yep, lots of things changing these days. I think we got more change on the way.
He pulls his helmet with the shattered visor out of his locker, and tosses it in the armor processing bin
North:
You feel it too?
York:
Y-know I felt it since Texas showed up. And when cops and military started shootin' at us, yeah, I find I just keep coming back to the same question in my head. Over and over again.
North:
And what question is that?
York:
We're the good guys, right?
North:
Yeah, of course we are.
York:
You don't sound so sure of yourself.
North:
No... No, I suppose I don't.
Cut to C.T. talking to a terminal
C.T.:
I'm trying. I understand. I I just need more time to- I have to go.
She sees Wash approaching and turns off the monitor, in which we see the Pilot, before walking past Wash
C.T.:
What're you looking at? Mind your own business.
Washington:
I should say the same.
And we're back to the Blues in their pet tank
Caboose:
Punch it Tucker!
Tucker:
I am punching it!
Caboose:
Well punch it harder. E- try kicking it!
Tucker:
Caboose this is as punched as this thing gets. It's a tank not a fucking Lamborghini.
Cut to Church on the base as they drive away
Church:
Good luck guys.
Tex:
So, think they'll make it?
Tremor
Church:
Oh, I think they might have time to squeeze in one last adventure. Can't really ask for more than that, can you.
Tex:
I suppose not.
Church:
So you decided to stay?
Tex:
Yeah.
Church:
Finally gave in and believed me, huh?
Tex:
Uh, not exactly. I just figured you haven't steered me wrong so far, h- why bet against a streak?
Church:
Well, come sit with me then. I got some great seats for the end of the world. I saved you one.
Tex:
Okay. You sure you wanna do this?
Tremor starts
Church:
Yeah. You know it took a couple versions of me to understand it but I think sometimes, sometimes you just gotta let go. And if you do, the things you let go sometimes come back on their own.
Tremor ends
Church:
They did today.
Tex:
Wow, guess the theory is proven right then. Nick o' time.
Church:
Yeah I guess it was.
Tex:
So uhh, any regrets?
Church:
Yeah, a few. I mean, probably should've learned how to shoot this damn sniper rifle.
Tex:
Hhh, you guys did have a lot of downtime. Could have practiced I don't know, once or twice.
Church:
Well, what can I tell you. I had other things on my mind I guess.
 

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